Do you awake each morning feeling like you are housing the world’s next heavy weight contender? Does your child live each day with apparent confidence that they are going to bring “home the gold”?Does it seem as though every issue quickly turns into a battle of the wills? The effectiveness of God’s plan for training our children is co-measurate to the temperament of our children.It does not matter whether your child is mild mannered or acts like a bull coming out of chute number nine in a bull riding contest! Word up and remain consistent and unwaivering. As many times as they test the standard, lovingly yet firmly meet them there until they conform their will to what you have requested of them. As a wise woman told me once upon a time, “God is the Creator and that child came from Him. That strong will is a part of their personality for a reason. Only God knows what that child’s future holds and why they are going to need that trait which you consider a character flaw. So, in the meantime, pray for wisdom and creative ways to channel that energy and tenaciousness until the time comes that it is going to snap into place!” As parents, it is our responsibility to teach them about God’s nature, character and role.There are unlimited examples and analogies for learning found in God’s creation and we have God’s word to teach us moral behavior and responsibilities. He has a purpose for all that exists!
Parents, we have to be under God’s authority to exercise authority! The “art” of “dusting pockets” is that we are suppose to be living a transparent life before all who surround us conforming our desires, goals and dreams to God’s will and direction. Just because we have been placed in a position of authority, we should be mindful of the accountability to God for how we exercise it over others. We can not abuse our parental privilege! When Jesus lived on the earth, He led based on His total obedience to God. His disciples saw Him angry, tired and hungry. He led based on His deep love for His followers! We have to consider, ” What would Jesus do if He had my job”? I believe that He would use a calm voice and lovingly and patiently call the child to come. He would then place them on His lap or draw them near and begin to instruct explaining the “how” and “why”. The “if you don’t” does not need to be explained the first time and sometimes not even the second. Giving the benefit of the doubt or giving direction in faith that it will be carried out is a positive way to lead no matter the age of the follower. When the child followed direction, I believe He would then praise the child, celebrating their obedience! Should the child choose to exercise their “freedom of choice” in a negative manner, I believe He would then reiterate the direction clearly negating any gray area. Upon the child disobeying, Jesus would not begin berating the child, offer a consequence he could/would not honor OR send them off to a cave to sit and stoke their anger and resentment! I believe He would then, with a loving calm voice, discipline the child and reiterate His unconditional love for them and His desire to bless them! We should display our love for our children in the same manner.If dad is ruled by how his day went at work or how he’s angry or disappointed in mom at the time, that’s not good! Mom’s, we can not exercise authority effectively over our children if we are ruled by our hormones! “UH OH!! Mom’s havin one of those days! Run for the hills and don’t forget to grab your rations on the way out! Dad will put out a flag when the coast is clear!” That’s teaching our children to be led by their emotions. We should not try to manipulate or instill fear to get desired results. We should not tell our children lies like, “I’m gonna call the police if you don’t mind me” OR “the boogyman is going to get you if you don’t stop throwing a tantrum”. Being deceitful will only cause you further problems. NOW the child is afraid to go to bed so they need to sleep with you. When they awake needing to go to the bathroom, and are afraid to get up and go in the dark, guess what?! NOW you are really tired, angry AND wet! You sowed a bad seed now you are experiencing crop failure! Find ways to establish a bond with your child in a manner that they will not want to disappoint you but, will strive to be celebrated by you! The more you connect, the less you will have to correct!